For those of you unaware, Skimpy had previously introduced the concept of NED, which is a one-stop solution to weasel your way out of any situation, without using excuses that might sound incredulous to a few intelligent people.
You don’t have to say that you need to take a crap, which is why you need to hang up the phone. Or that you can’t do work because you’re tied up with many other things that have ‘taken up your bandwidth’. You just have to say quite honestly that you have no enthusiasm to perform aforesaid task (NED are there), and that is that.
Given my current state of unemployment (and no, I was not fired, quite contrary to what you might have been told. I resigned on my own before they could even think along those lines), cash inflow has been cut. There are some savings, but they’re dwindling alarmingly, and it will be some time before some pending payments shall come my way.
It isn’t smart to dig deeply into one’s savings right away, and hence I’ve come up with a ready excuse for those who don’t want to listen to NED being sent their way.
This concept is called NID (No Income Da), which gives all those of us gloriously unemployed people a pertinent reason to weasel out of any engagement, citing excuse of lack of funds.
Of course, the activity must require a decent amount of spending, and will not work if you’re asked to hang out at the neighbourhood Iyengar bakery to eat an egg-puff. Under such a circumstance, a different type of excuse needs to be concocted.
If used properly, NID can also be a weapon of emotional blackmail that might result in you getting treated by the person who wanted to hang out with you. It hasn’t happened to me so far, I don’t hang out and merely choose to sleep until 1300 each day.
I had plans of waking up and taking a mouthwash with rum, to kill all the germs, because that is what unemployed bums do, but, like other brilliant ideas I’ve had, this remains an unimplemented plan. By the time I move out of Bangalore fully, if I am unable to execute this plan, it will remain what it originally was, a beautiful, unfulfilled dream.
Lastly, I was discussing the funda of NID with Skimpy, and our man came up with a pertinent observation, “NID lasts only so long as you’re unemployed, but NED can last you a lifetime!“. Amen to that.
On a slightly different note, I should’ve put NED + NID and refrained from watching 13B last night, with a couple of friends. Please don’t watch it even if you’ve produced / directed / starred in the movie. Thank you.
You tagged the post with “mouthwash”?? How about making a parser that parses all the words and adds them to tags now on? How does that sound?
KThxBye
I wanted to tag it as ‘rum mouthwash’ or ‘alcohol mouthwash’ so kindred spirits would be attracted. I brain-farted, my bad O Almighty NishitD!