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Wednesday May 23rd 2012

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A Novel Way to Punish Traffic Offenders

Enough and more has been said by me about the traffic offenders of Bangalore city. I’ve been very unrealistic in the past, and have prescribed capital punishment in the form of public execution on certain occasions at traffic signals for people who commit grave offences.

But now, after some significant introspection, I realize that the suggestions and steps I put forth weren’t really implementable. Hence, I’ve come up with another brilliant alternative idea that might be a little easier to implement.

Anyone who doesn’t drive / ride their vehicle properly, and has been caught and fined on more than N occasions (N : to be defined) should be tattooed on their forehead with something that will cause them to be the butt of ridicule for everyone concerned.

Maybe something like ‘traffic offender‘, or ‘I can’t able to drive‘ (works best for techies, some from my company included), ‘I can haz ambulance??‘ might just do the trick. It has to be just above the eyebrows, so that even emo-cuts (punk rocker style) cannot hide the tattoos. Further suggestions for witty stuff to be tattooed are welcome. Please to comment.

I like this solution better, no capital punishment involved. Amnesty International cannot issue a fatwa against me. At the same time, politicians and cops can still make a lot of side money by siphoning off funds to be allocated to the various tattoo artists who’d be involved in putting forehead tattoos.

I propose that someone draft a proposal so that we can submit it to our honourable Governor, who is bombed ad nauseum with stupid petitions anyway. One more will not really make a big difference.

Reader Feedback

6 Responses to “A Novel Way to Punish Traffic Offenders”

  1. varunkr says:

    Slight correction…it should be ” I can’t be able to drive”

  2. Hari says:

    @varunkr,
    Your naïveté is glaringly obvious. K.

  3. ameya says:

    A better idea would be to increase their insurance premium by N times (as a fine) while depreciating the value of the vehicle by N times as well. This means total financial loss. Then may be people will learn some lessons.

  4. Tall Dude says:

    Even if the premiums were increased N times, people would just default and that wouldn’t affect the guys who tend to break the rules again and again. There are many who break the rules, get caught, pay fines and break it again the next day (helmet offenders and license lapse guys to name a few). Its always googd to be optimistic that people will learn their lessons.

    Some suggestions for the tattoos (Maybe i got carried away):
    1) SMOOTH CRIMINAL
    2) DESHDROHI :)
    3) POLICE
    4) DAREDEVIL
    5) SUPERMAAN

  5. Hari says:

    @ameya,
    How practical is that? Those with monies will still get away. Offensive forehead tattoos is a blanket solution.

  6. Hari says:

    @Tall Dude,
    Nice suggestions, I’m working on localization of the content so that the police depts of various states can also be given content to tattoo. There should also be a pool of offensive stuff that the tattoo artist can choose from, and also put in the font / colour of his / her choice.

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