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Thursday February 9th 2012

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Ten Commandments in LOL Speak

Given my continued fascination for LOL speak, I’ve decided to undertake a collaborative project with anyone interested to translate the Bible into LOL speak. I would’ve translated other holy works as well, but its quite easy to work on the Bible for starters, since it is already in English.

Regretfully, LOL speak is still in its nascent stages and as a result, the other language variants haven’t yet been put into place. Once that is done, we can undertake the noble task of translating other works into LOL speak in their original language. Until then, we have to resort to performing all these translations in Klingon.

This serves the dual purpose of ensuring that we can propagate the words of all religions in easy to understand modern day language, while also incrementing the total number of languages / dialects in which said religious books have been published by one.

Without further ado, here are the Ten Commandments in LOL Speak. For their actual translation, kindly refer the wiki page for the Ten Commandments (linked here just in case you end up getting the Charlton Heston movie of the same name).

Iz preeching tiem folks!

  • O hai!!! Welcum! When u sez OMG, eetz me. No one else. Aight? KTHX.
  • U can’t haz OMG name eef u wrong. Not eeven fer kuteness. Kapish?
  • Rmbr Sabbath, heyah? Eetz nawt just holiday, eetz a holy day!
  • Geev ur maw and paw props.
  • U cant haz murder charges.
  • U cant make adultery. Meens, no sleeping around.
Give up only. Totally. Brains are fried.

However, Feel free to add comments, so I can update this list. In the truest spirit of collaboration.

Reader Feedback

7 Responses to “Ten Commandments in LOL Speak”

  1. Devrat says:

    actually this sounded more like larry and bob speak (pearls before swine) but all the same, i couldn’t stop myself imagining charlton heston blurting out these here lines and man, is it hilarious. :D

  2. Deborah says:

    Very nice!

    I’m an artist from Queens, and I illustrated the Ten Commandments in the style of road sign pictograms earlier this year. You may appreciate them (see website link).

  3. Hari says:

    @Devrat,
    Larry and Bob the crocs?? Naah, not entirely, though I can see where you’re coming from.

  4. Hari says:

    @Deborah,
    Hi! I checked them out, nice! Although I must be candid and say that it would take some amount of time for one to figure out what those road signs say, if they didn’t know for sure that they referred to the Ten Commandments!

  5. Abhijith Mohan says:

    Hmm…this is a toughie.

    8. Stealing Kitteh can no haz cheezburger.
    9. If u iz goan heven to god kitteh, u can no lie about neighbour kitteh.
    10.Neighbour kitteh’s missus and uder things no iz cheezburger. U can no have!

  6. Devrat says:

    @Hari,
    after reading your previous LOL speak post, i now understand what you mean…and i owe it to you that i haven’t drifted over to the dark side though i might be guilty of tech speak on a number of occasions.

  7. Hari says:

    @Devrat,
    Its all good, bro! Don’t switch to tech speak ever. Its not worth your while.

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